I was saddened to read about the Irish bride who “bagged herself a bargain” on EBay by buying a €6 brand new wedding dress from China.

In these tight times, I can understand how brides might think this is a fantastic idea. Anything to do with weddings has an overinflated price-tag, especially wedding dresses but I’m asking everyone to think about the true cost of this “bargain”.

When I was planning my wedding last year, I just couldn’t justify spending thousands on a dress that was essentially the most expensive cost-per-wear item I’d ever own.

I was briefly tempted by a Google ad boasting suspiciously cheap, fully customised wedding dresses, knock-off designer dresses for a fraction of the cost. When I saw the dresses were made in China, I was immediately turned off.

The internet and particularly EBay has allowed smaller, family-run textile companies to sell their products direct to the consumer all over the world. Nobody can deny that this is a good thing, as long as they can make a good living out of it.

Chinese cottage industry?

The €6 wedding dress isn’t made by some enterprising Chinese granny, building an EBay empire with a Singer machine and her web savvy grandchildren. More than likely, the average cheap Chinese wedding dress is made by the human equivalent of a battery hen, in crowded and sometimes dangerous conditions, receiving little pay, working extremely long hours and enduring inhumane conditions (to the point of prohibited bathroom breaks).

Picture the misery and suffering that goes into that beautiful dress, and the contrast of the happy bride thrilled about her unbelievable bargain is a little grotesque.

It is unbelievable, because the numbers don’t work. How can a company (even a Chinese one) pay overheads, advertising and material costs, let alone pay a fair and decent wage to the people making these dresses, and still make a worthwhile profit? The only way to make that work is through exploitation, pure and simple.

Surely it can’t be that bad? Am I exaggerating? The problem is, there’s no way to tell.

Spotlight on the consumer giants

Multi-national giants like Nike and Primark are always under a lot of scrutiny about their Chinese made clothes. Recently they’ve spent a lot of time and money improving their factories. They may not be perfect, but they are under pressure to provide a living wage, ensuring basic health and safety and rejecting child and slave labour in their supply chain.

All this regulation and inspection and even they can’t get it right all the time. We always hear about violations and scandals. They have to constantly monitor every factory, supplier and outsourcer, because all too often there are people willing to exploit others in the name of a (slightly) greater profit. Not even Primark, with its huge economies of scale and reputation for cheap clothes would see the economic viability (or have the audacity) to sell a €6 wedding dress.

Ethical standards for all

If these huge companies with reputations to protect get it wrong, imagine what some ruthless “entrepreneur” with a couple of sewing machines and a website will try tp get away with. Just because these companies are faceless, doesn’t mean they shouldn’t be held to ethical standards.

Do you think they dispose of their textile waste carefully and care about where they source their materials? Do you think their employees can take a sick day, work in a safe environment or have the luxury to feel a glowing sense of satisfaction that they are working to create someone’s dream wedding dress?

Cutting wedding costs – ethically

Nobody can deny that weddings cost too much. If you’re on a tight wedding budget, consider buying a pre-loved dress on EBay (like I did), go vintage, borrow or hire one, or find an ethical supplier.

Alternatively, find an organisation like Barnardo’s who sell brand new, samples, seconds and pre-loved wedding dresses through their special bridal shops.

Profits help fund their work looking after vulnerable and exploited children. I love what they do (I even used to work for them) and they have some absolutely incredible wedding dresses.  Turn your happily ever after into a chance to do good for a child’s future. How’s that for a wedding dress enriched in good karma?

The demand for bargain wedding dresses will always be there, but we’re better than that, we can’t pretend that it’s fair or right. We have the luxury to choose to only support ethical suppliers.

Ladies, don’t be tempted and do the right thing. There is just nothing pretty or romantic about a €6 wedding dress.

Denise

Denise is a travel blogger, Law of Attraction and personal development coach and a public speaker. She is currently travelling around the world with her husband Mark as winners of the Ultimate Job competition. Follow their adventure at www.thehoneymoontesters.com

Of course, the greenest honeymoon would be to stay local and with a bit of imagination, create a beautiful, fun and magical honeymoon that is also kind to the planet. Staycations are all the rage and if you get the weather right, you can have a cheap and guilt free holiday in your own country.

However, some of us (especially those living in cold climates) dream longingly of a sun-kissed beach in an exotic country. But we’re reluctant to call us ourselves “environmentally conscious” while at the same time travelling half way across the planet and (let’s face it) contributing a very dirty carbon footprint.

It’s an ethical dilemma. So what’s an eco girl to do to balance both of these desires?

Let’s face it. Some of us will travel on planes around the globe for our honeymoons and it’s pointless to spend the whole time feeling guilty. My own honeymoon spanned the UK, Singapore, Indonesia and Australia, and now in our jobs as The Honeymoon Testers, we’re travelling around the world for six months. This definitely does tug at my environmental conscience but I still, perhaps ironically, think of myself as someone who cares about the future of our planet.

I know I’m not the only one with this moral predicament. Our generation longs to be global citizens, but nobody wants to create more damage to the planet than is necessary. Rather than be hypocrites and tell you to stay at home, we’ve been gleaning ideas to share with other honeymooners with itchy feet.

By any means, these actions don’t cancel out your globe-trotting altogether, but here are some small and easy tips that you can do to reduce your impact without spending every second worrying about it.

Choose your holiday wisely

Start with the end in mind and support destinations that use renewable power, have community programmes and implement relevant environmental policies (not just the one about reusing your bath towels). This includes water usage, waste disposal and building materials.

Most importantly find places that are creating jobs and wealth in their communities including sharing clean water and sanitation for local people. Do employees get paid fairly, or are they reliant on tips to earn a living wage? Does your resort benefit the community or is an oasis of wealth and privilege amongst grinding poverty?

Holidays involving animals should have ethical conservation policies as well as being respectful to preserving environments for animals to live in the wild. We’ve heard horror stories about dolphins being kept at pets in resort pools (and committing suicide), tourists offered photo opportunities with toothless and chained tigers, and performing elephants trained with violence and intimidation. Don’t give these places your money and contribute to the problem. Eco-tourism can be profitable and beneficial so spread the word about inspiring enterprises.

Air conditioning

Every hotel and resort I’ve been to cranks the air-conditioning to nipple-popping levels, making the contrast to outside even more unbearable. Make sure you turn it off whenever you leave the room, and check back after breakfast to ensure that the housekeeper hasn’t turned it back on to run all day.

If you have good mosquito nets, consider not using the AC all night and open a window instead. On our honeymoon in Indonesia, we lived in a cabin on stilts in the water and the warm ocean breeze was our air-con.

Bottled drinks

In many developing countries bottled water is still a necessity, and you could get seriously sick from drinking the tap water. In these cases find the most local brand, buy the biggest bottles so you don’t go through hundreds of the smaller ones and dispose of them carefully. Ask your hotel if they recycle.

What’s better, glass or plastic? In most countries, glass is more easily recycled and you’re more likely to see plastic trashing beaches and littering oceans.

If the chances of getting sick are slim, filter and boil your own water using tablets, special drinking straws and filtering water bottles.

Many countries such as Singapore and Mauritius have tap water that is absolutely fine to drink so always ask and don’t be paranoid, but use the filtering options mentioned if you’re worried. Fill up your reusable water bottles in the morning to use all day.

A great alternative to bottled drinks are fresh green coconuts served straight off the tree. Coconut water is extremely good for you, tasty and is nature’s version of sugary energy drinks. The coconut shells are biodegradable and in some countries are used as a fuel source. It’s also money that’s going straight back into the local economy, as they grow wild and aren’t owned by a global bottling company that gives a pittance profit margin.

Food and drink

Going meat-free on honeymoon will give you a much better chance of avoiding food poisoning or sickness. Many countries have low standards around battery farms or humane slaughtering practices, so even if you aren’t vegetarian or vegan, consider doing it for your honeymoon.

Take the opportunity to try local beers and wines where possible, and talk to the chef about where and how fish and vegetables are sourced.

Tropical countries have an abundance of fresh fruit, so take advantage of supporting the local economy and as long as it has a peel (pineapple, mango, passion fruit, bananas etc) then it’s almost always safe to eat.

Find your own off-set

There are definitely controversies around flight off-set schemes, so find one that feels right for you. You may want to support a local regeneration programme, a global organisation that plants trees or an animal conservation charity instead.

Considering doing some charity work with the local economy, donating time, money or materials such as pens and books to local schools.

You can ask your wedding guests to donate to the community in lieu of a wedding present, or give you give vouchers for low impact activities such as bike tours or massages.

Spend your money ethically and avoid illegal DVDs (it can support crime), don’t take home shells or coral, don’t buy products made with plastic, endangered or rare materials and buy locally made, sustainably produced souvenirs such as beaded jewellery or woven handicrafts.

Of course, there are many other small actions you can take that are probably second nature to you. Always pick up your trash (but I know you do that anyway!), switch off lights, don’t charge electronics unnecessarily and reuse your beach and bath towels.

You could spend the whole honeymoon debating the merits and relative damage of each activity, but you are there to enjoy yourself and live this wonderful time together according to your values and principles. Do what you can and try to benefit each place in some way.

Lastly, travelling the planet and meeting other cultures is a wonderful and life-enriching thing, and wouldn’t it be great if our children can do it (relatively) guilt-free? There will be better ways to travel in the future if we demand it, using renewable sources of energy to power our planes (hey, maybe even teleportation) so always support organisations that are paving the way so it becomes unacceptable (and unprofitable) for the holiday industry to exploit the natural resources of our beautiful planet.

Just being conscious about your every day actions will give you plenty of ideas that you can share with others too. It’s hard to get this 100% right, so enjoy your honeymoon as much as possible, and spread love as you go – for each other and for planet Earth.

…

Denise Duffield-Thomas is a blogger, writer and speaker who is currently travelling the world with her husband Mark as “The Honeymoon Testers”, reviewing the best wedding and honeymoon destinations on behalf of travel company Runaway Bride and Groom.

We had a very civilised tea party in the afternoon at my bridesmaid Jacqui’s house and then a naughty drag queen cabaret followed by Chinese food in Soho.

What was even more lovely is how supportive my friends are of my diet and lifestyle choices. Not many people understand about being a raw vegan, but my friends are used to it now, and everyone chipped in to make it a gorgeous and healthy tea party.

We had a raw chocolate mousse cake specially made by Charlie’s Raw Treats, as well as her brownies, figgy bites, lemon pockets and almond cookies.

My friend Blanka who writes Gracefully Raw made raw flax and vegetable crackers and the most amazing lemon coconut macaroons!

My writer friend John Tyson, even made a raw vegan chocolate mud cake (he’s not even raw – he googled it – how sweet!).

My favourite raw food mentor Karen Knowler once told me that champagne is raw too and so I had a LOT of that!

Of course there were lots of other non-raw goodies and I ate them all – gorgeous muffins, meringue (my favourite!), cute little sandwiches, gorgeous potato salad! Washed down with lots of Pimms of course!

Denise Duffield-Thomas  is the creator of Raw Brides – a website for savvy brides-to-be who want to look amazing for their big day and beyond. You can find out more at www.rawbrides.com and download a free ebook!

Why an ethical wedding?

We aren’t big consumers in our personal lives, so we didn’t want a wedding that created a huge carbon footprint. We’re mindful of most of the issues, and it seemed natural to us to question a lot of the traditional aspects of weddings that create so much unnecessary waste and expenditure.

What was the most difficult bit?

The biggest difficulty was that most of my family live in Australia, but we live in London and most of our friends live here too.  A way around all our family flying over here is that we have two weddings – one in the UK and one in Australia. That obviously increased the budget and our carbon footprint!

What were the best bits?

Pre-loved jewellery
My engagement ring came from Gray’s Antique Market in Bond St, and it’s a beautiful 1920s platinum ring. Mark bought me some antique pearls from the same place as a wedding present and Mark’s ring was found in an antique store as well – a very romantic platinum band with engraved flowers all around it.

My wedding ring is a 1930s platinum eternity band from a second hand dealer in Portobello Market, and I found my rhinestone earrings in another shop in the market. We got all of our rings engraved with our wedding and engagement dates, but we just loved that they were pre-loved – we think it’s incredibly romantic and also we’re thrilled with the classic designs.

The best presents EVER
Because we were travelling through Asia on the way to our Australian wedding, we asked our guests to buy us intangible presents. They could choose to buy us a vegan dinner on our trip, an experience like a yoga class, or they could donate to a local project, like an orphanage in Bali. One friend even bought us a gift voucher to Kiva – so we could lend to an entrepreneur in a developing country.

The honeymoon
On our honeymoon we stayed in small eco resorts, family run hotels, yoga retreats and an awesome hotel in Singapore that served salads for breakfast.  Part of our honeymoon was even spent doing a fasting retreat in a yoga centre!

The lovely venue
We found a gorgeous old Tudor house and barn which is run by an education trust that puts on gardening workshops for children and young offenders.

We got married in the barn and then because of our beautiful summer’s day we had most of the afternoon reception outdoors, in the Tudor garden and orchards, playing cricket and having picnics on the grass. We hardly needed any decorations because the barn already had fairy lights and a huge vaulted wooden ceiling. Outside there were lovely fruit orchards and hedges, so we just got a few flowers to decorate tables for the evening.

Our venue in Australia was the local surf club, so we got “married” again on the beach – no decorations needed.  We just used green apples in fish bowls with some green foliage on the tables with a few flowers.

A summer picnic
During the day, the vegans and raw foodists had fresh fruit and raw vegan chocolate brownies, made by Charlie’s Raw Treats.

We found a local brewery, which supplied biodegradable cases of beer as well as zero-carbon water from Belu (we couldn’t have tap water at the venue). Everything else was recycled afterwards.

In the evening, while the carnivores had locally-grown lamb and vegetables, the veggies, vegans and raw foodists had a fabulous creation of raw lasagne (from a Russell James recipe), and then a specially made dessert of raw chocolate brownie, raw lemon cheesecake and berries.

A nice side effect
Although we were both interested in green issues before we got married, going on a raw vegan diet had a welcome side effect for both of us. I lost over 7kgs (two dress sizes) just by cutting out dairy and meat, and Mark lost a bunch of weight too. By the time the wedding came around, we felt so much healthier and had so much more energy while we were travelling on our honeymoon.

Fashion
I know it doesn’t sound very eco but I had more than one dress… hear me out!
I got a big traditional dress second-hand off EBay, and a slinkier dress to wear later and to take to Australia. Both of these dresses have been sold again to Ebay, so hopefully someone else will wear them and love them too. I made my own headpiece, and found an antique paper umbrella from Greenwich markets.

We recycled the bridesmaids’ dresses from the first wedding for the second one in the UK. Thank god they worked on all four girls!

How did it go on the day?

It was just such a chilled day, and it was so fab having my mum, little brother and uncle over from Australia. Thank god the weather was good. It’s always a gamble in the UK, even in summer. We were panicking because we didn’t really have a plan B – we would have all had to be jammed into the barn.

The sun meant that we could play around in the sunshine, and everyone was relaxed and happy. The live local jazz band really added to the day too.

The venue provided an archery range, we had giant Jenga, and a big cricket game broke out between the Aussies and the Brits. All in all, it wasn’t the most expensive or complicated wedding – but it was truly spectacular!

Getting married on the beach at the Australian wedding was amazing, we could even see whales on the horizon. The funniest thing was at the end of the night – we reused the apple decorations to play a game with all the guests.

Top tips for an ethical and green wedding

• Don’t beat yourself up
  Some things will feel easy to make eco – and others will feel hard. Do the best you can do, but don’t worry if you don’t get absolutely everything right. I felt like I had to compromise on some things to keep my groom happy, but I was happy with most of the actions we took.
• Minimise the unimportant
  Ignore the things like party favours on tables (nobody will miss them) or cake boxes (we had just ten just in case). If you are printing programmes or menus, not everyone needs a copy. As long as there is good food and drink – people don’t care about anything else!
• Go secondhand
  There are so many gorgeous wedding dresses on EBay that have been worn only for a couple of days. You can find bridesmaids dresses, shoes, and all sorts of decorations that other more zealous brides feel like they couldn’t do without. You can benefit!
  Secondhand jewellery is also extremely romantic and if you go for a classic design, it will look brand new.
• Don’t be afraid to ask!
  When we first met our caterer, both of us were carnivores – by the time our taste testing rolled around Mark was mostly vegetarian and I was a raw vegan foodist! I was embarrassed at first to ask to change the menu to include a raw option – even though we were paying for it (and I used to be an event planner!). The caterer was totally fine with it, and very intrigued about making a raw lasagne.
• Finally – make it fun and totally YOUR DAY
  Don’t worry about what everyone else thinks you “should” have – and make it as personal as you want. There aren’t any rules anymore!

About Denise
Denise is the creator of Raw Brides – a website for women who want to look fabulous for their big day and beyond by eating a natural, whole foods diet and changing their mindset about how they feel about their bodies. You can find out more and also download a free ebook from www.rawbrides.com