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In late July, I attended my brother’s sister-in-law’s ‘mainstream’ wedding reception. As my family and her family are now a big family (since my brother married her older sister), her mother asked my stepmom and I to dress alike in kebayas—Indonesian typical ‘formal’ dress for women (she even gave us the fabric for the dress)—for the reception. Below is a photo of my family and the newlyweds (that’s me, the one wrapped in a headscarf).

Lighting and Music
During the reception, I was like counting how many energy sucked for the reception that lasted from 3 to 8 PM. It was conducted in a very big, fancy venue. So many lightings and the music was LOUD, I felt no romance whatsoever. Even the wedding singers sang lots of break-up songs!

Decor
The décor was beautiful, but I assume it must be very expensive (my dad mentioned a quote that’s as much as my planned wedding budget). So I observed which part of the décor that I could adapt for my very own wedding, in particular the ones that could probably be made by ourselves (I mean me, Mr. H, or someone else we know). I have actually been thinking about branches. There are scores of dead trees by the highway street in my place and they still have the branches. Every time I pass by those dead trees, I feel like climbing up and chop the dead branches. Pretty nice imagination, though

Makeup
I’ve attended many weddings and I always find this one very similar thing: the makeup of the brides is always too thick. I understand that it’s their special day, but I just don’t get it why they would let the makeup artist paint their faces that way. Ironically, you pay SO MUCH for the service! Mr. H and I have been considering about using our friend’s talent for my makeup. I have someone in mind, but I haven’t said anything to her.

Dirty Plates
Another akin thing in most wedding receptions here: a wedding venue (wherever it is—a hotel, a house, etc.) is supposed to be a nice and clean place, but I always see a mess in all wedding I attended. It is ‘customary’ here that once the guests finish their meals, they put the plates and everything under the chairs or tables (only fancy weddings have tables for guests, but most weddings here provide only chairs due to the size of the venue, so please visualize guests holding plates with their one hands). There are usually other people who will take them out to be cleaned, but those people cannot always take the dirty plates in an instant, so you can imagine what the floor looks like, I guess. This is tricky. I don’t know how to handle this for my own wedding.

Do We Need Trays?
As I’ve just mentioned, most non-fancy wedding receptions here in my place only provide chairs (minus tables) for the guests to sit. And it’s a common thing for hosts to have lesser number of chairs than the number of guests. Well, unlike Western weddings or other fancy weddings in my country, most receptions here do not have programs. So, there’s no such thing as guests seeing the newlyweds enter the reception venue or any other programs. People here are usually allowed to choose when to come (during the time stated in the invitation), they enter and sign the guestbook, shake hands with few family members of the bride and groom who stand on the entrance of the venue, eat, and congratulate the newlyweds.

Well, to my experience, guests are always kind of busy when it comes to taking the food (usually on buffet). They take the plate, have the chosen food in the plate, take the water (most often mineral water in plastic glasses), take some fruits and small cakes, and then find a seat. Can you picture how many hands are actually needed there? Well, I still have no idea how to manage that as well for my wedding later.

At least I’ve these checklists of to-dos.